i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
