and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize