the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
40s are totally the cure
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
