I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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