Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
