what day is it and did you see me today?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize