she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
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