The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
