doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize