Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
