I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
