I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
