You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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