You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
