I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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