No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize