It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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