Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize