2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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