I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
