How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize