too bad you live with your parents still
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I have post one night stand depression
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize