are you so shy because you have an std?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
