Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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