Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize