shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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