If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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