she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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