the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
one might say we're banned from that church
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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