That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
