he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
