What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
There r osticjed everywhere
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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