I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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