Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize