people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
