Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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