Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Randomize
