guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
