New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
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