I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
