Got a toothbrush?
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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