I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
God, you're like boner-b-gone
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
