I feel like I'm in dance class right now
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize