i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Randomize
