He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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