i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
You ate ashes out of my bong
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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