maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
