Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
The struggles of a small town man whore
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