i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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