Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
